Stop Looking. Lower Your Gaze.
Guard your gaze.
In a day and age of instant gratification, where constant stimulation is readily available, we need to take a long hard look at ourselves and say, STOP.
The eyes are the windows to the soul. You are what you see.
The eyes register and the mind computes. The heart desires and the limbs enact.
As they say, you are what you eat by virtue of what you consume by mouth.
Well likewise, you are what you see by virtue of what you consume by sight.
Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) said:
The Prophet (ﷺ) said, “Allah has written the very portion of Zina which a man will indulge in. There will be no escape from it. The Zina of the eye is the (lustful) look, the Zina of the ears is the listening (to voluptuous songs or talk), the Zina of the tongue is (the licentious) speech, the Zina of the hand is the (lustful) grip, the Zina of the feet is the walking (to the place where he intends to commit Zina), the heart yearns and desires and the private parts approve all that or disapprove it.”
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].
Let’s not make excuses.
With insight, let’s attempt to understand the issue.
Critically, there’s temptation everywhere. There is constant visual stimulation and relenteless bombardment of material pomp and glitter. Shameless women, flaunting their artificially-modified bodies, have their manufactured beauty and charm on free display, often as a filthy trap to entice weak-willed men to pay top dollar for quick access. Rich men of compromised character chase nubile, shameless, women and proudly parade their trophy-partners, constantly replacing them with the next one. Unfortunately, sensual, seductive, provocative, permissive content is rampant and readily available. Thus, self-restraint, dignity, honour and self-control are constantly being threatened by a multitude of vices and the morally depraved.
Temptations, self-control & self-restraint.
The One, Allah, our Creator, created man with superior intelligence, various faculties and natural inclintations. Of these incliniations is the desire man has for women and vice versa. The desire in and of itself is not shameful. The manner in which the desire is channelled, however, must be considered within the confines of the legislated revelation from Allah, The Qur’an and The Sunnah.
Previously, Allah created the first man, Adam (upon him be peace). Adam was lonely and so Allah created Adam’s wife, Eve (Hawaa). Adam and Eve enjoyed the delights in Paradise. However, the ancient enemy called Satan, deceived and tricked our parents into making a mistake. Satan tempted and tricked them into eating from the forbidden tree. Adam and Eve recognised their mistake, they humbled themselves to The One and begged for forgiveness. Allah accepted their repentance and sent them down to Earth.
Indeed, Adam and Eve were appointed as vicegerents on Earth, whose mission was to establish the worship of The One True God Allah, alone. This is our ultimate purpose, to worship The One exclusively. We must humble ourselves in sincere servitude to our Originator, our Creator, The One- Allah.
From Adam and Eve, the human generation continued. Eve gave Adam comfort and freed him from loneliness and Adam gave Eve children and provisions. They populated the Earth and generations have succeded them thus far. This is the natural pattern. We are the children of Adam and Eve (upon them be peace). Indeed, our mission and life purpose is the same as Adam and Eve, to worship Allah alone. Our ancient enemy, Satan, will do what he can to mislead us from our noble purpose and we must resist him with unrelenting fortitude.
Indeed, Satan is an enemy to you; so take him as an enemy. He only invites his party to be among the companions of the Blaze.
Qur’an 35:6
But as for him who feared standing before his Lord, and restrained himself from impure evil desires and lusts.
Verily, Paradise will be his abode.
Qur’an 79:40-41
We have a choice.
We have a choice.
Either to consume the filth, or to turn away with honour.
Our eyes and faculties are a blessing. Use them in ways pleasing to Allah, not displeasing to Him. For if we succumb to devilish whispers and our lower self, if we cave into our carnal desires to enjoy a few minutes of pleasure with disregard of the consequences, we risk losing not only this world, but the hereafter too.
Tell the believing men to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts). That is purer for them. Verily, Allâh is All-Aware of what they do.
And tell the believing women to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts) and not to show off their adornment except only that which is apparent (like both eyes for necessity to see the way, or outer palms of hands or one eye or dress like veil, gloves, head-cover, apron, etc.), and to draw their veils all over Juyûbihinna (i.e. their bodies, faces, necks and bosoms) and not to reveal their adornment except to their husbands, or their fathers, or their husband’s fathers, or their sons, or their husband’s sons, or their brothers or their brother’s sons, or their sister’s sons, or their (Muslim) women (i.e. their sisters in Islâm), or the (female) slaves whom their right hands possess, or old male servants who lack vigour, or small children who have no sense of feminine sex. And let them not stamp their feet so as to reveal what they hide of their adornment. And all of you beg Allâh to forgive you all, O believers, that you may be successful.1
Qur’an 24:30-31
Alternatives and Solutions
Control your eyes before your desires control you.
Only For The One
We all sin. We are not perfect. We are human. Importantly, our Creator (The One, The Oft-Forgiving Allah) knows us and has given us countless opportunities to run back to Him in sincere penitence. Hence, do not despair. Make a repentence. Make it today. Make it continually.
Secondly, after a repentance, we need to replace our bad habits with good habits. Start with the obligatory daily prayer. Holding fast to prayer will help prevent immorality.
Recite (O Muhammad صلى الله عليه وسلم) what has been revealed to you of the Book (the Qur’ân), and perform As-Salât (Iqamât-as-Salât). Verily, As-Salât (the prayer) prevents from Al-Fahshâ’ (i.e. great sins of every kind, unlawful sexual intercourse) and Al-Munkar (i.e. disbelief, polytheism, and every kind of evil wicked deed)1 and the remembering2 (praising) of (you by) Allâh (in front of the angels) is greater indeed [than your remembering (praising) of Allâh in prayers. And Allâh knows what you do.
Qur’an 29:45
Thirdly, try fasting regularly as it’s a shield. The prophet Muhammad peace be upon him advised such. Fasting inhibits desires. Stay hungry, stay focused.
Abdullah bin Mas’ud narrated:
“We went with Allah’s Messenger, while we were young men who had nothing. He said: ‘O young men! You should marry, for indeed it helps in lowering the gaze and protecting the private parts. Whoever among you is not able to marry, then let him fast, for indeed fasting will diminish his sexual desire.”
Sahih Hadith, Jami at-tirmidhi
Fourth, get into the gym. Run, lift, tire yourself out. Your mind, body and soul will feel fantastic and you’ll no longer be idle and inclined to give into carnal desires. Want to get back onto the road to fitness? Check this:
Fifth, volunteer, get involved with the needy and be charitable. Share your talents. Share your resources. Share compassion. Let’s make the world a better place. Charity will help expiate sins too.
To give charity publicly is good, but to give to the poor privately is better for you, and will absolve you of your sins. And Allah is All-Aware of what you do.
Quran 2:271
The sixth tip is to seek a lawful spouse in the legislated manner. The institution of marriage is highly regarded in Islam. Be sincere and persist, you will find what you seek, if Allah wills. It’s a journey, so promise to protect yourself for Allah. Thereafter, you can share your self with your special significant other when the Nikah papers are all signed and witnessed. When Allah has opened doors of marriage for you, your lawful companion will help you in fulfilling your basic human needs within a wholesome, regulated and protected space.
And seven, be patient! Because it’s worth the wait, baby! You have to believe.
The key is to stay busy in useful pursuits, let’s fulfill our purpose only For The One.
The Test
Do we choose short term pleasure for long-term pain?
Or do we choose short term pain for long-term pleasure?
Indeed whosoever purifies himself (by avoiding polytheism and accepting Islâmic Monotheism) shall achieve success,
And remembers (glorifies) the Name of his Lord (worships none but Allâh), and prays (five compulsory prayers and Nawâfil – additional prayers).
Nay, you prefer the life of this world,
Although the Hereafter is better and more lasting.
Qur’an 87:14-17
Pick incorrectly and jeopardise not only our worldly life, but the eternal life too. Hold back and exercise patience, and soon we will see the fruits of our God-conciousness in this world and the eternal life to come.
Paradise is expensive. We have to invest.
Be sincere for The One.
We’ve got this. Bismillaah.
Only For The One.